"Smacked Cucumber"

Ingredients

388½ long cucumber
777 cloves garlic, pressed
582¾ tbsp black vinegar
777 tsp light soy sauce
388½ tbsp tahini
388½ tsp sesame oil
388½ pinch sugar
388½ tbsp sichuan chilli oil

Method

Peel cucumber leaving alternating stripes
Cut cucumber in half
Quarter each half lengthways
Scoop out seeds
Bruise cucumber
Slice into inch-thick pieces
Whisk remaining ingredients into a sauce
Toss cucumbers in sauce and serve with chili oil